Importance of "Personalities" in being Welcoming

One thing I have noticed about groups especially groups that are new or want to grow - is that it takes a real personality type to actively reach out and connect with new people.  That connection isn't a simple handshake or a smile or a "Hello."  That person does not need to be in a designated leadership role but does need to "represent" the heart of the group and have publicly displayed respect from the authority figure.

From what I can tell it is a mix of qualities and its an overall impression that one gives almost instantly.  There are some pretty well know roles that play out in group dynamics but a useful one is the "mother hen" that can guide people into the right spots.  Many churches tend to rely on not only the Pastor/Rector but also his/her spouse to fill that role.  It puts a lot of pressure at the top.

There has been some turmoil in our midst at St. A.'s from the loss of one of the welcoming people who was very gifted at raising people's spirits.  While I don't want to join any side -- it is important to acknowledge that role is empty and we as a congregation need to find ways to fill it.

Unfortunately, without someone filling this role or having these qualities -- it is one of the key reasons for failures of groups.  It seems like a lot of what a Kindergarten teacher would be doing/saying but in this case to everyone not just 5 & 6 year olds.

So in my own mind, I'm trying to nail down some of the qualities - but what I find equally interesting is that these need to be done from a point of "pleasure" vs. tasked:

• Extroverted / Outgoing
• Kind
• Good listener
• Good at connecting like people
• Put and tend people on paths
• Authentic / Sincere
• Willingness to share
• Raising spirit / Enliven 
• Good memory of names and faces
• Balance Emotion and Intellect
• Motivational
• Trustworthy
• Skilled
• Inclusive
• Fair
• Navigate around walls

wel·come  (wlkm)

adj.

1. Received with pleasure and hospitality into one's company or home: a welcome guest.

2. Giving pleasure or satisfaction; agreeable or gratifying: a welcome respite from hard work.

3. Cordially or willingly permitted or invited: You are welcome to join us.

4. Used in the expression you're welcome to acknowledge an expression of gratitude.

n.

1. A cordial greeting or hospitable reception given to an arriving person.

2. A reception upon arrival: gave the stranger an unfriendly welcome.

3. The state of being welcome: Don't overstay your welcome.

tr.v. wel·comed, wel·com·ing, wel·comes

1. To greet, receive, or entertain (another or others) cordially or hospitably.

2. To receive or accept gladly: would welcome a little privacy.